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A little trouble shooting

January 15, 2013 //
4

mouse fixing

I asked all the Dedes individually what they thought of Foreign Correspondent’s performance and whether we should go ahead with his proposal. Most of them couldn’t care less as long as it didn’t increase their workload. The one who really had to think hard about it was Mouse, as she does all the work around here. When she realised there was something going on, she watched Foreign Correspondent closely, but couldn’t fault him. He is a professional. Over the weekend he translated all the background information and recreated the blog in German, so he could start as soon as the Dede Committee gave him the green light.

Foreign Correspondent had also been watching Mouse and last night he approached her. “Do you think we could fix the problem with the images?” he asked “I don’t want to start posting when this problem isn’t solved.”

Mouse was taken aback at first. She felt he was making demands, despite him being the newbie. In her opinion newbies have to keep their mouth’s shut, just watch and slip into place once they had observed enough and found their own little niche. They are not supposed to make suggestions, not on the first day at least… Unfortunately, Mouse herself knew something wasn’t working correctly, but she pretended she didn’t know. “What’s wrong?” she asked with a surprised tone in her voice and a tad defensive.

“When I first look at a new post, the pics are crunched up in tiny little boxes” Foreign Correspondent described the problem. “I have to double click first to see them in full size and they don’t show up in the Reader either.”

Mouse admitted that she has had the same problem, but initially thought it was just a little glitch with her computer. She thought she had fixed it when she double clicked on it and the visitors wouldn’t have a problem. Indeed, she had asked some people and they were totally unaware of the problem she was talking about, while others said they had also experienced it.

“It all worked a breeze before, until the WordPress people made changes to the library module” Mouse explained. “I don’t know what I can do about it. I’ve tried virtually everything!”

“I’ve noticed” Foreign Correspondent answered. “Now I can’t even double click anymore.”

“I am at the end of my tether. I even sent a support question to WordPress, but have had no response yet. It might have something to do with the template I am using, maybe I have to change this.”

Foreign Correspondent suggested I should give him a lift to my office, while Mouse stayed at home and made changes. Then he could use the computer at work to check whether it worked or not.

When I went to bed last night, Mouse and Foreign Correspondent were busy skyping and changing things, but without the usual screaming and cursing. I don’t know if they have fixed the problem or not.

We will see when this post goes up.

It would be great if readers who have had this problem could let Mouse and Foreign Correspondent know if it has been fixed. Or if not, does anybody have an idea what’s going on? Your help is very much appreciated!

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Categories Art, Fun, Hand Puppets, Life, Relationships, Social Network

Foreign Correspondent

January 13, 2013 //
7

foreign correspondant

Today is Sunday again and the Dedes are all curious about what the second installment from Miss Viwi on ||:::VEGGIETORIA:::|| will be like. I am pretty sure they will be hanging around the living room tonight again so they don’t miss the new post.

Miss Viwi’s series got the Dedes thinking. We got a few comments lately from German speaking readers and friends who said they use the Dedes to brush up on their English, but sometimes they are not sure about the meaning as the blog is quite colloquial. During the week this fellow introduced himself to me. He claimed to be a foreign correspondent. I didn’t believe him at first, he looks more like a tourist to me, but then he put forward his ideas and I changed my mind. He seems to know what he is talking about.

Here is what he suggested: He is going to scan all the posts on the dedepuppet blog and will write a summary twice a week in German. These summaries will be posted on dedepuppetsde.wordpress.com, not on this blog here. There will be no new stories on the German blog at all, as all the Dedes are in New Zealand, so new stories can only happen here and they will continue to happen in English. Of course Foreign Correspondent will report back to us if any interesting comments are made.

I haven’t put it to the Dede committee yet to find out what they think, but Foreign Correspondent was proactive and translated the site anyway. He says he wants to be ready to roll as soon as he gets the go ahead. I said he should hold his horses as we will put him to the test when Miss Viwi’s post needs to be translated again. So tonight he will be presenting his proposal and translation to the Dedes.

What do you think?

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Categories Art, Fun, Hand Puppets, Life, Relationships, Social Network

Hello neighbours

January 12, 2013 //
6

the neigbours

The weather here is just fantastic at the moment. During the day it is hot, but still bearable, and when night falls, it becomes balmy. This is the time when it is lovely to sit outside for a little, before the mosquitoes start their battle for dominance  outdoors. Last night a few of us where sitting on the deck, having a quiet wind-down from a busy week, when Nosy Neighbour and his wife Two-faced walked by. They only got married last year and we don’t see much of them. We see him more than her, though. We really only know her as a shadow behind the curtain in their living room. He, on the other hand, is out and about. He does some gardening or fetches the newspaper and I even think he does the shopping for the two of them. He particularly likes to be out after the Dedes have had a loud party. Sometimes I suspect he is only hanging around in the open in order to catch me and have a good old rant about my lot.

“Hello neighbours,” I called out when I saw them passing “Want to join us?”

They looked at each other and Two-faced shook her head. “Would love to catch up” Nosy Neighbour replied, “but we have to keep going. We have to do something about the kilos we gained over Christmas.” Nevertheless, he approached the deck a little, but Two-faced was anchored firmly to the footpath and didn’t move an inch.

“Lovely evening for it” Devil said to keep the small-talk going.

“I’ve just started to read your blog” Nosy Neighbour told us, when he finally stopped a few paces from where we were sitting.

“What do you think?” Mouse wanted to know of course.

“Interesting read” he said and looked at me. “I don’t even know why you bother. They are such a nuisance.” He pointed with his head towards my little friends, and continued talking as if they weren’t there. “Why don’t you kick them all out and that is it. No more problems! Myself? I wouldn’t put up with their crap!”

All the Dedes that were with me started laughing. They thought it was a big big joke. Only I knew he was serious. I had too many similar conversations with him before.

“They are not that bad” I appeased him. He rolled his eyes, turned around and mumbled: “You really have to mow your lawn too” while he walked back to his wife, who was still waiting on the foot path. She waived at us with a smile, before they walked on.

“He has such dead pan humour, I just love it!” Devil said.

“We should invite them to our next barbeque,” Mouse added. “It’s a pity we know so little about them, they are Dedes just like us, aren’t they?”

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Categories Art, Fun, Hand Puppets, Life, Relationships, Social Network

But what about us monkeys?

January 11, 2013 //
2

monkey lamp

Yes, I was happy with Philosopher’s statement about what the Dede’s mission is. They are celebrating diversity! I was really happy for a day, until Monkey showed up.

Monkey swung through the curtains to the floor lamp and stopped a safe distance from me. I observed him closely. He is a bit stand-offish and usually only comes to see me in a group with others. Even today he looked as if he had to muster all his bravery. He sat there and casually scratched some flees out of his fur. Finally he addressed me: “Diversity you said… ”

“Yes”, I answered proudly “That’s what the Dedes are about”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“You could also say ‘Live and let live!’ Embracing all the differences” I said.

“Funny you should say that” said Monkey, still sitting at a safe distance.  “So what about the monkeys then?”

“What about them?” I asked as I had no clue what he was on about.

“Aren’t you writing a book!” Monkey said.

“No, not at the moment, though I have written plenty of books in the past. Now I am too busy with the Dedes”

“So it’s not true that you have a nearly completed book in the drawer… The others told me so.”

And then all of a sudden it occurred to me,  yes, right. Last summer before the Dedes burst onto the scene I was indeed working on a book that contained all my wisdom of over sixteen years of teaching digital imaging. I had made good progress until the rain set in and the Dedes pushed into my life.

“Ah, you mean ‘Let’s kill that monkey‘?” I blurted out. Oops, only now I noticed what an unfortunate title it had.

Monkey jumped a bit further away from me and said: “Yes that one”.

I laughed out loud. “No worries… I don’t really kill monkeys. Did you really think I would?”

He wanted to know why I gave my book such a mean title. It is a clear call to violence after all. I explained it was frustration talking. I had the strong feeling some of my students didn’t really want to be bothered with understanding the programs, but chose just to fluff around and see what comes out. I wouldn’t call my student monkeys, no way, but any work created without intention I call ‘monkey work’.

“This doesn’t sound like celebrating differences. In fact it is very derogatory. You have to come up with a different term!” said Monkey while swinging away.

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Categories Art, Fun, Hand Puppets, Life, Relationships, Social Network

Philosopher’s thought

January 10, 2013 //
10

philosopher walk

On Wednesday mornings Philosopher comes round and picks me up for a walk. I treasure this hour with him. There is no need to talk, if there is nothing to talk about. Sometimes silence in company can feel awkward, you certainly know that feeling, but with Philosopher quietness feels comforting. He has a very good head on his shoulders. And if you talk, you can be sure he would never pooh pooh any ideas – even if they are miles off the beaten track – nor would he speak badly about anyone.

So we walked in silence for a while and then I had to ask him: “So, Philosopher, what do you think about Witch’s comment on the blog yesterday?”

“Sorry, I don’t read your blog,” he answered honestly. “What happened?”

“You don’t read my blog?” I asked in disbelief.

“A lot of your friends don’t. Everybody knows you will tell them what’s happening anyway next time you see them.”

“Do they really?”  I tried to remember the barbeques I had been to lately and started to wonder if everybody is getting sick of me. Am I  quietly turning into a bore? I have to admit, Philosopher is right, the Dedes are my favourite subject.

“Oh, yes,” Philosopher smiled benevolently. “But don’t worry, they all like your passion – and not just that, they love us Dedes.” Before I could think more about my real friends, Philosopher got me back on my original train of thought: “So what did Witch say?”

I told him that Witch was taken aback by my remark the Dedes are for fun. It was just an aside and I wished Witch wouldn’t read my blog and wouldn’t pick up on little throw-away phrases like that.

“Do you think we are for fun?” Philosopher inquired.

“Not always… but what do you think, Philosopher, what is the agenda of the Dedes? Help me out here, please.” I know for a fact Witch would love to have more space on the blog to promote a frugal and healthy lifestyle. Cash Cow might support her, but it would displease most of the other Dedes, as this is really just Witch’s hobby-horse.

Philosopher didn’t think long: “In my opinion, the Dedes are celebrating diversity and they are having fun while doing it. This, my valued friend, is a good enough reason for their existence!”

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Categories Art, Fun, Hand Puppets, Life, Relationships, Social Network

Pirate’s proposition

January 8, 2013 //
9

pirates deal

Last night we had a storm. Nothing unusual really in our neck of the woods. However, this time the storm blew Pirate back home. I haven’t seen him for ages. I think last time was when he wanted to sell me his dad’s old vinyl records, because he thought I still had a record player to listen to them.

Pirate is rather an odd one. He calls himself an entrepreneur. I am not sure, but I think in the old days you would have called someone like him a wheeler and dealer. Nobody really knows what he does for a living. Sometimes he has pockets full of money, other times he has to conveniently leave for an important meeting before the bill can be settled.

He has tried his hand at everything… pyramid schemes, that truly weren’t pyramid schemes (his words, not mine), fixing computer viruses via phone and selling grandmothers…. But if you know all this, and can withstand the pressure to buy, he is actually a really lovely Dede.

So last night he came round to my house and asked if he could stay for dinner. ‘Oh!’, I thought to myself,  ‘watch out, he is poor at the moment’. I am not too keen on his company when he is poor. Not because of the fact that he has no money. No, no, I don’t like him for the hair-raising schemes he devises when he is desperate. But then, he is always happy to take us out to posh restaurants when he is rich, so how could I not share our simple meal with him?

“So, I hear the Dedes are doing well” he said, while he was watching me cooking dinner. “They even had something written about them in Austria!”

“Yes,” I confirmed, but didn’t want to say more.

“Are you making money yet?” he came straight to the point.

“What kind of question is that?” I asked. “We are not in it for the money – We are having fun!”

“Bullshit” he said. “Don’t give me that airy fairy crap…”

“And you watch your language” I interrupted.

“I am a pirate for god’s sake,” he reminded me of the obvious. How could I forget looking at his hideous mustache.

He came back to his proposition: “You know, you are sitting on a gold mine. Just let me be your manager. I will organise everything for you.” He pushed a piece of paper over the breakfast bar in my direction. I glanced at the heading: ‘Manager’s Contract’. “We could do T-shirts and printed coffee mugs and, oh, the mind boggles…” His eyes glazed over.

“Dream on….” I said to him, while I fished spaghetti out of the pot. “We have to sell the Hermit’s Web books first!” I didn’t have the heart to tell him outright that he would be the last Dede I would entrust with my affairs.

“But…” he started again. I stopped what I was doing and stared deep into his one good eye.

“Just asking…” he said a bit huffy, but I knew he’d got the message.

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Categories Art, Fun, Hand Puppets, Life, Relationships, Social Network

In the dog box again

January 6, 2013 //
8

devil telling me off

As ArtistatExit0 commented yesterday, Pig and Witch might not tell me their story because they still have mutual respect for each other. So I decided to let the sleeping dogs lie – for now at least. I know myself, sometime in the future, when I tidy up, I will come across this picture again and my curiosity will get the better of me once more. One day I will find out….

Anyway, I was just sitting here writing my blog, when Mouse came running through the door.  At 8:15 in the morning! I was more than surprised… I know very well that Mouse (our little gossip) has a very busy schedule on Sundays. It is a set routine for her. Every Sunday the same… She starts her day with an early morning breakfast with Devil, then goes on to have a mid-morning snack with Pirate, lunch with whoever has a story to tell. Then she moves on to have coffee and cake with Deutsch Fraulein (German girl) and dinner at Witch‘s place in the company of Cat. She finishes her day with a night cap at Professor and Pig‘s place if there is no party to go to. You will certainly agree that is a lot to get through in one day.

Today she must have had a very short breakfast with Devil. I was just about to ask her what happened when I realised she was fuming. “So when were you going to tell us?” she squeaked at me.

“What?” I said, totally unaware about what I had done now.

“You traitor, you went to ||:::VEGGIETORIA:::|| all by yourself and none of us knew.” I noticed Devil appeared in the door now as well. Mouse had run so fast that she left him in the dust.

“This is not quite correct!” I replied: “L’Artiste was with me.”

“L’artiste doesn’t know anything about public relations, you should have consulted with the rest of us.” Mouse made such a roar that more and more Dedes woke up and made their way to the kitchen, where I was sitting writing my blog.

“What’s going on?” asked Ducky, the politician. “Tell them,” Mouse said, hands on hips.

So I told them the story.

Before Christmas, Miss Viwi, an Austrian blogger invited L’Artiste  and myself to visit her site ||:::VEGGIETORIA:::|| for an interview. Miss Viwi is concerned about contemporary nutrition and animal welfare and is also very interested in art.  She has fallen in love with the Dedes and wanted to profile them on her blog for German speakers. The series about the Dede puppets will start today with the first installment.

“It didn’t occur to you to talk to us about what to say in the interview?” Devil asked.

“Honestly, they were mostly art questions. After the incident with Buchalov, I thought you guys were not particularly interested in art. And anyway, I think L’Artiste and I did a reasonably good job” I defended myself.

“Give us an example” Mouse demanded.

“Ah, there were so many questions… Let me think, one was how I had….”

“Admit it, it wasn’t really about us, it was about you!” Devil said. “Didn’t you say in your New Year’s resolution that this year it will be all about the Dedes and not about you…. Here we go, we are not even one week into the New Year and you failed…”

“Give it a break, Devil!” I got a bit angry now “Just wait until the first post is published and read it yourself!” I told them the first post will be published in Austria in the morning, which would be night time for us.

I had to get out of here and left them sitting in the kitchen while I went for a run. This is the reason why my post was a little bit late today.

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Categories Art, Fun, Hand Puppets, Life, Relationships, Social Network

No… he won’t tell!

January 5, 2013 //
2

hermits web.indd

Since Professor  revealed one of Pig’s secrets yesterday, I thought I’d grab my chance and dig out this old photo I found in the shed and ask him about it too. I had already published this photo  in ‘Hermit’s Web’, but still don’t know what the story behind it is. It is such a mystery to me, as Witch and Pig barely talk to each other.  Looking at the photo they must have been good friends at one stage. Neither Pig nor Witch will tell me what happened and it irks me tremendously that I don’t know what the story is.

It wasn’t one of my better ideas. Professor looked at me as if he wanted to kill me and said: “Please!…” and left me standing there. Devil who was with us at the time shook his head and said: “You really have a way of putting your foot in it, don’t you!” and wandered off as well.

It seems everybody knows but me. Don’t tell me you all know as well! Do you have any ideas? Please, please tell me!

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Categories Art, Fun, Hand Puppets, Life, Relationships, Social Network

Star signs

January 3, 2013 //
4

philosopher hugs capricorn

On Wednesday mornings Philosopher and I go for a walk. We have done this since we first met. Philosopher lives in a derelict boat at the bottom of my garden and like clockwork he comes up to the house on Wednesdays and picks me up for a stroll around the sports ground. We usually discuss what has happened during the last week. But of course yesterday there wasn’t much to talk about, as all the Dedes have been pretty much together 24/7 since I came back from my Christmas holidays a week ago.

He was at the brunch the day before and I know he would make the New Year’s resolutions public, as he thinks publicizing them would put more pressure on the Dedes to deliver. But in the meantime, I have spoken to some of the other Dedes who were asleep that day and they aren’t too keen to have their intentions made public. Basically, they don’t want to lose face if they can’t stick to it.

So I had to find another subject to talk about and I mentioned to Philosopher that Jürgen and Buchalov commented in their birthday wishes that the Dedes would be Capricorn as their birthday is on the 30th of December. “Hmm”, Philosopher said, “that is quite interesting.”

“Why?” I wanted to know, I am not very familiar with astrology.

He explained to me that in German the star sign of Capricorn is an ibex, a mountain goat. But the constellation of the stars in the sky is a combination of a mountain goat and a fish. That means a Capricorn wants to climb to the highest heights but at the same time wants to explore the deepest depths. Their mottoes are ‘good things take time’ and ‘success is to 10 percent talent and 90% hard work’. They are not particularly creative and have the tendency to be dogmatic. But they certainly want to be successful and noticed.

In my inner eye I compared the Dedes that were born in December with what I’ve heard. Philosopher, yes, he certainly explores the depth of things. We all know Mouse is a hard worker but not creative, and Devil is certainly dogmatic.

The more Philosopher told me about the star sign, the more I started to believe that there is something in it.

In the end he asked me: “So what’s your star sign then?”

“Libra” I said. Philosopher stopped in his tracks and said: “Now that is a match made in heaven. Opposites attract, don’t they?”

“So what’s Libra like then?” I was really curious now.

He told me they are supposed to be very creative and open-minded with a very strong sense of fairness. Libras avoid taking sides – to the point that they annoy everybody with their ambivalence –  and aim to be well balanced.

And then he went on that in a partnership between Libra and Capricorn there is a lot of tension, but it can be very successful if they work out their differences.

I liked what I heard and thought I really have to read up more on this.

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Categories Art, Fun, Hand Puppets, Life, Relationships, Social Network

Resolutions! What else?

January 1, 2013 //
2

prof and pig drunk

Happy New Year everyone!

I hope you are in better shape than Professor and Pig today :). These two guys didn’t even make it to the count down at midnight. They were out of it well before then and slept right through all the hoohaa of welcoming in the New Year. Okay, it is not too difficult to miss the arrival of the New Year in New Zealand. It is not like in the colder parts of the world, with big fireworks everywhere. We have fireworks at Guy Fawkes, but now it is summer and the high season for bush fires, so open fires would be a real hazard. We also live in a very quiet neighbourhood, which is even quieter now as all the neighbours are on their big vacation at the moment.

So what else can you do, but drink?

I left shortly after midnight to skype to the other side of the world. I think it is funny to talk from the future. After all, we were already in 2013, while in Germany they still had to see out stuffy old 2012. When I came back Professor and Pig hadn’t moved an inch. They were still lying in the same position on the sofa, Pig hugging a last bottle of beer. Some of the other Dedes were discussing a silly note  to write and photograph together with the pair, but they couldn’t come up with anything. Two days of partying certainly had taken it’s toll on everybody. The wit had gone, off on holiday with the neighbour’s kids.

Witch, a teetotaler and a health freak, had the idea to write down a New Year’s resolution of ‘Drink less’, then she went up to Professor and nudged him until he groaned: “Hey Professor, are you okay with this resolution? ‘Drink less’.”

“Certainly” he mumbled.

“Then sign!” She pressed a pen into his hand and held the paper under the tip. Professor managed to scribble a P. She then went on to wake up Pig who dutifully placed his X next to Professor’s signature.

Someone suggested we all come up with New Year’s resolutions and thought I should judge whether they manage to keep to their resolutions or not. I was surprised how many thought it was a good idea. Not all of of them agreed of course, but most of them wrote down what they wanted to do for this year and gave me their folded up pieces of paper to keep safe.

I will remind them in due time!

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Categories Art, Fun, Hand Puppets, Life, Relationships, Social Network
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