Archives for the month of: March, 2015

EIW goodbye

As you might know, the Dedes help their artist to understand the world at large, and specific situations and people. But sometimes there is nothing to understand, it is just plain absurd. For the first time in their existence some Dedes have to exit. They have to go because they become more trouble than they are worth. There is no other solution. The artist declares defeat. It isn’t the first time that Dedes leave. No, other Dedes have left voluntarily, like Punch too, who is now known by his stage name Han the Vere. Others are sponsored, like Harvey, the obnoxious womaniser. A sponsored puppet is one that has been sold, but still lives with the Dedes in the art cupboard and takes part in films and contributes to the blog.

Today another puppet will leave. This time it will be the lil’Dede Empress in Waiting. EIW, as she is known for short, doesn’t have much grey matter in her little head. Not enough space I guess. She is a selfish little creature and has always been attracted to Top Dog. Well, not so much to Top Dog himself, but the perceived power he has. With Top Dog out in the garden, poor little EIW is now nothing more than a shrinking violet. So she went to the artist and asked, no demanded, to be re-homed. As it happens, a friend of the artist is getting married in a few weeks and for reasons not to be elaborated on, she’ll appreciate receiving EIW’s head on a platter as the perfect wedding present.

So EIW went into the garden to wave good-bye to her old comrade in arms, obviously as happy as can be that she dodged a bullet once more. Ah well, that’s the benefit of being “in waiting”… you are never in the firing line :)

scare crow

Poor old Top Dog is still out there in the garden, exposed to wind, rain and a little sunshine in between. Of course, the other Dedes feel sorry for him and in good old lovey-dovey Dede fashion would like to invite him back into the house. All his past actions and words forgiven and forgotten, in the hope he has learnt his lesson during the wet and dark nights. But this time, the artist put her foot down and said “No”. She needs to have him gone for the sake of the other Dedes. Top Dog’s demise is of course symbolic.

To make use of the figure, the artist donated his head to a scientific experiment, run by Pavlova, the lab rat. They want to find out how long it will take a Dede to turn into something unrecognisable when exposed to the elements. As the puppets are made from paper mache they are unsuitable for an outdoor environment. Though the surface of the head is treated, the artist had expected it will turn into mush with the first heavy rain. It hasn’t. Top Dog has survived four days now and knocking on his head proves he is as strong as ever (it looks like he quite likes being knocked on the head :). At least he is getting some attention). The whole thing might drag on for a while. Meanwhile, the rest of the Dedes have come to accept that Top Dog definitely won’t return. They still find it very unsettling. After all he is a Dede. To ease their grief they are now taking bets on how long it will take before he is finished. We will keep you posted.

top dog scare rain

The plan worked perfectly! Mouse and Devil had to use a tiny trick though. It was important to let Top Dog believe it was his idea to take part in the competition. So they pretended to talk in private about who should represent the Dedes in the Scarecrow competition. You may know, Top Dog is blessed with unbelievably good hearing, far better than any other Dede. (Sometimes they even wonder if he doesn’t have secret listening devices scattered around the place.) As soon as he hears an interesting conversation he pops by and participates, no, takes over. Needless to say, he immediately decided that he is the one and only perfect candidate to become a scarecrow. Mouse and Devil ummed and arred for a little while and finally said they would have to confer with the others and would get back to him. They just went around the corner to the art cup board and watched from afar how Top Dog immediately rummaged through the old rags in the laundry to find himself something to wear. Then he went out to the garden and found a nice position to practise his scarecrow skills, right next to a lovely green pepper for company.

It didn’t take long before it started to rain. Oops. All of a sudden he looked pretty scared.

top dog scare

This is no good. It is more than a month since I have written on my blog. Honestly, the Artist’s survival cookbook is progressing. Not fast, but it is moving forward. It is currently at the design stage. The Dedes had millions of boring meetings to figure out how they should publish it.  You know, those kind of meetings where the discussion goes round and round in circles. Then the meeting is declared over without a tenable outcome and a new meeting has to be called another time. And very quickly a week, then a month, passes by.

You might find it hard to believe, but the Dedes are usually good decision makers. Even though they banter a lot, they know each other’s strength and weaknesses and trust the next Dede implicitly. But then there is Top Dog. Top Dog entered the scene sometime last year and never fitted in. He is adamant he is the best, knows everything better and is not interested in anybody’s opinion unless it coincides with his own. He loves to manage but not in a co-operative kind of way, more like a despot. In short, he wants to run the show and is not interested in what others with arguably more expererience can contribute – unless he directs them to do so. The Dedes quickly figured out his cocksure behaviour was to cover up his own inadequacies. They avoided saying anything that could be construed as disagreement.  When he has the feeling he is being criticised he gets extremely aggressive and loses the plot. Ultimately, the Dedes keep to themselves as they don’t like unnecessary arguments, so they let him do his own thing and he could feel important in front of the mirror. It’s by no means the first time they have had to deal with a difficult compatriot. Though usually the difficult ones come round once they realise the Dedes are a knowledgeable and peaceful bunch who work towards building a comfortable,  non-threatening environment.  Top Dog, however, hasn’t settled. Instead he constantly complains about how he isn’t respected enough. Well, as Philosopher always says: “Respect can’t be demanded, it has to be earned.”

There is a point when even the most patient Dedes has to say “enough is enough”. So, the other day the core team of Dedes, Mouse, Devil and Witch, along with a handful of others got together to discuss what on earth they could do. They realised the presence of Top Dog undermines their work. Their plans have slowed to a near stand – still and the only way to get back on track is if he goes. As it happens, tomorrow is the Scarecrow in the Garden competition here in Beach Haven and Mouse, the keen gardener, suggested to nominate Top Dog to become their representative in the competition. That will make him feel very important, but of course, as it will rain on and off tomorrow, the weather will see to his demise very quickly.