Archives for the month of: November, 2012

I went to the pub with Philosopher last night. After all it was Friday. I was so annoyed with Bobby that I couldn’t stop talking about him. I went on and on with blah, blah, blah and blah, blah, blah. You know the story. Philosopher is not the right person to have a rant to. He just sits there, lets you get it all out, but doesn’t respond. And I have to admit that gets boring very quickly. If you have a rant, you want to have someone who tells you that you are right and who understands your problem, not someone who just sits there with his eyes closed, smiling mildly. So in the end I started to get annoyed with Philosopher. This doesn’t happen very often.

What he finally said – though infuriating last night – makes sense the light of morning. He said: “So far, Bobby has done a fine job in my opinion. If you want someone to bend the rules for you, you should have employed Monkey as a policeman, not Bobby. But then, Monkey would bend the rules for anybody who gives him a banana, not just you. So what use would that be?”

Mouse really should have been the first one to hear about Lou‘s confession. Unfortunately, I had sent her to a friend’s house on Wednesday to help with the new Dede dresses we have ordered for the workshop tomorrow. I rang my friend yesterday, but Mouse couldn’t come to the phone. My friend said she was sitting on the deck in the wicker basket sunbathing. So much for her help!

Now, since Bobby and Clay Head had announced they were going to interview us yesterday, I had to tell them that Lou came clean. I am not a gossip. I haven’t told anyone else yet (apart from you of course, but I trust you explicitly. I am sure you can keep a secret, can’t you?)

I cancelled the appointment with Bobby and Clay Head as their services were no longer needed and expected them to basically forget the whole incident and let Mouse come up with an appropriate punishment. Oh, am I naive or what? Bobby looked at me with his stern face and said: “That is not how it works, Missy! You called the police and you can’t just cancel on us willy nilly. We are not like a plumber and or an  electrician. We are the police! We have to write a report!” And out they got their big pens and started writing.

“But there are no lives endangered! It was just a juvenile joke”

“You should have thought about this before you engaged us…” lectured Clay Head, but was interrupted by a short sharp “Ha!” from Bobby. We both looked at him “Juvenile joke!…” he exclaimed “I have seen Lou‘s record… he is not a first time offender. He already has a strike against his name. Back in June he attacked Skeleton Edeltraut.”

Oh no, not this old story, I thought and said: “We never really solved this one. It was just a matter of two different opinions.” I remembered clearly, it went  on for ever with he-said/she-said and all the Dedes took sides. I was so happy when it finally got quieter around the story and I was so sure time would heal the wounds of all involved. I was surprised to hear now that it was on Lou‘s official record.

“Hang on,” I continued, “you can’t just put a strike against a name and not notify the person, or me in this case, as I am his guardian. He is still a puppy!”

“You have to make a submission… then we might re-open the case. You have to go through the official channels!” Bobby said coldly and continued writing on his report. It was obvious  I wouldn’t achieve anything here today….

Pleeeeeeaaaaase, give me a bottle of wine and send for Philosopher!

When I came home from sports last night, I crashed on the sofa. Of course not without moving Lou first, who seems to have set up camp permanently on MY favourite spot. It didn’t take him long to come back and hop on my lap. He was quite cuddly…. which is very much out of character for him. Usually he is immersed in his own thoughts and insists on his own space. But yesterday was definitely different.

After a while he asked sort of casually: “So the police are coming tomorrow?” I nodded while I had my eyes on the TV.

“What for?” he inquired

“Ah, you know, they want to find out who wrote the email to cancel the the party”

“What happens to the puppet who wrote the email when they find out?”

“I don’t know” I said, I really didn’t want to answer all these questions. I wanted to watch the news on TV. After all, America has been voting.

“Will the puppet go to jail?” he continued.

“Don’t be silly!” I laughed to disperse his obvious worries and stop his questioning.

“After all the police are involved” he said quietly to validate his previous thought.

“Hang on a minute.” I looked at him seriously but he immediately started scratching flees out of his fur. “Why all these questions? Do you know something?”

He was too busy to answer. I put my hand on his tummy and repeated the question slowly. He looked to the side and said “Maybe.” Which in his lingo means as much as “I know the whole story, but I am not prepared to tell it yet.”

“It was you! Wasn’t it? But why?”

And then he blurted it all out. On the day of the party, he had his cereal in the the kitchen. Mouse talked to Philosopher in the living room. Needless to say they weren’t aware that he was there and the door was ajar. So, Mouse asked Philosopher to take Lou away for the night, as Skeleton wanted to come to the party but was still traumatised by the shopping incident in June. Philosopher said something to the tune of it might be helpful for the healing process if Lou and Skeleton meet on neutral ground, but Mouse didn’t want to have a bar of it. She insisted! In the end, she said she is going to ring a charter boat company right now – knowing how much Philosopher loves the sea – and charter a boat for the two of them. After all, it was her responsibility to organise a great party and if she agrees to organise, she does it thoroughly. Lou has to go! She doesn’t want to have any trouble makers in the house.

Of course Lou was taken aback. He wouldn’t call himself a trouble maker (but who would?). In fact he had been looking forward to the evening and really wanted to catch up with Skeleton in particular. It was apparent that  Mouse had made up her mind and this wasn’t going to happen.

She shouldn’t have left her laptop logged-on in the kitchen. Lou just thought: If I can’t have a party, nobody will have one – and did the deed.

“What now?” He asked timidly when he had finished the story.

I should declare the 6th of November “Poor Puppy Day”. We all know fireworks scare the wits out of animals, but Lou has taken Guy Fawkes particularly badly this year. While Cat and Mouse are back to their usual business, Lou is still lying on the sofa under the blanket and feeling sorry for himself. He has done so all day yesterday. Okay, he is young and he suffers from mood-swings: One week he is totally over the moon and it is all happy, happy, joy, joy.  The next week he is lethargic and doesn’t move an inch from his chosen patch.  I have to be honest with you here, seeing the young puppy like this makes me feel extremely uncomfortable, as I don’t know what to do when he is down. Shall I just leave him to it or shall I talk to him? I haven’t figured it out yet.

Tomorrow Bobby and Clay Head will come around and interview us about the email. Maybe I should ask Bobby if there is a chance to train Lou as a sniffer dog. A bit more routine might help.

Yesterday was “Guy Fawkes”, a bonfire night, an English custom celebrated in New Zealand – mainly because it is the only time of the year when you are allowed to have private fireworks. In previous years nothing much happened in our neighbourhood. We live in what some might call a lower socio-economic area (and love it). But recently a lot of houses around here were for sale and we got a set of new neighbours. It looks like the area is starting to gentrify. One sure sign was the amount of fireworks we had here last night. The street went to town!

Much to the pleasure of some of the Dedes, but not all. While Devil, Sunny and a bunch of others ran out in the garden to watch, Cat, Mouse and puppy Lou huddled together under a blanket and were visibly uncomfortable with the goings-on. Mouse pleaded with me to make them stop. I pretended I would do something about it, knowing very well that I couldn’t. But I hoped it would be all over in half an hour anyway.

When I came into the garden the Dedes were standing around in a circle and Devil was daring Daredevil to use one of the rockets as a jet pack. You should have seen me… I turned into a human rocket… This was definitely one step to far. Devil is grounded for a week!

Apologies that I didn’t get a photo of this incident. It was over all too quickly.

Clay Head told me I should give Bobby a break and let him do his job. Fine by me. I have other things to deal with this week. Next Saturday is the puppeteer workshop I am running with the “Older Women’s Network”. It has been on my mind for weeks. The duration is 1.5 hours and I have arranged and re-arranged my approach on how to spend that time at least a hundred and fifty times. I haven’t developed a formal outline yet. Instead I have made new puppets. I thought puppet making will clear my mind, unfortunately I came up with more silly stories.

The picture today shows the latest entrants, bar Bobby. He is doing his rounds with Clay Head trying to find out who cancelled the party. So he was too busy to attend the photo shoot. Cash Cow is a bit slow, she hasn’t got her colours yet. In fact she is Cash Cow V2. The first one didn’t work out, so I remodeled her into a monkey. Cheeky little thing pushed himself to the front to get his skin first.

The new entrants are (in the back row from left): Rob Daylight, the daylight robber and Daredevil the wannabe hero. In the front row: Cash Cow with the empty udder, Monkey (no explanation needed) and Harvey, the rabbit with a gambling problem.

These puppets I have made especially for the workshop – they are members of the Touch Troupe. The idea was to have this troupe as a set of public performers who might not pop up on the blog much. But then Cash Cow has already moved into my garage, she needed a cheap crash pad. She is so broke she can’t afford to pay rent anywhere else.

Here goes this idea!

Bobby got his colours yesterday. It was a very nice ceremony. Congratulations, I say with a smile …and gritted teeth. I can tell you guys, I am very disappointed!

Yes,we all knew Bobby will become a policeman one day… He looked like such a fun guy while he was still at the Academy and we were all looking forward to having him on neigbourhood watch. But now that he is finished he turned out totally different.

Have you ever experienced this? You give someone a tincy whincy bit of authority and overnight they turn into real pricks and start terrorising their old friends – only because they can do it, because they have the power. Bobby seems to be one of those.  Yesterday he cried tears of joy for winning the election,  thanking everybody and shaking hands with every single puppet. Today he is a stickler for rules. He stands upright and has this “don’t-mess-with-me-look” on his face. All the fun seems to be gone. He is like a brick head.

I certainly hope this change of behaviour is because he is young and inexperienced and has to prove himself to the world… He takes his new job seriously and doesn’t want  to muck it up… – not because he is a red-neck idiot!

Only time will tell.

Maybe it is my fault, and I was a bit too hasty when I  said to my reader Whichwillitbe that if Bobby stuffs up he will be out of his job faster than you can say “boo”

The voting for the head of the investigation into the cancelled email has closed now. There is a big surprise! We got another vote last night from far-away India and after counting all the votes, there is a tie…. Two of the candidates, Bobby and Clay Head have exactly the same amount….

This is unprecedented – there is no rule about this situation in the Dede Puppet Voting Handbook. So what to do? My first idea of course was that I should have the casting vote. But on second thought, this is not the best idea. The Dedes resent me already for making up all the rules. If I had the casting vote, the whole election would be rendered a mockery, wouldn’t it? I could have put forward my candidate in the first place and not gone through the whole  election process.

In the end I discussed the issue with Philosopher, who has a really good head on his shoulders. I was hoping he would go for Clay Head, after all he had put him forward.

Far from it!

“There is no doubt,” Philosopher said, “Clay Head, as an outsider will do a great job.” But he also agrees with the reader Whichwillitbe, who voted for Bobby: The young ones should be given a fair chance. How can they gain experience when the old farts always get the best jobs? So his suggestion is that both of them will head the investigation together. This will take the pressure off Bobby as it is his first job outside the Academy and he can learn a lot from Clay Head‘s expertise. Clay Head will get some recognition and a foot hold back into the Dede world (We all have the feeling, he regrets converting into a clay head.)

By the way, Bobby will get his colours this afternoon.

It isn’t my week! I really need a break, to go away for the weekend and leave this lot behind. We just had our little tiff at Halloween when they took the mickey out of me, and now, only two days later, I have another riot on my hands. I wish they wouldn’t always jump in, boots and all, before they know the entire story.

I went to a Gallery yesterday to sound out the possibility for an exhibition of the Dede puppets. Procrastinator, even though I haven’t started him yet, has held me back for a long time. But finally, finally, finally, I went. It was all very positive. Usually I would mull it around in my head for a while and quietly discuss how to proceed with my partner. But as it happened I skyped with my brother in Germany last night. Unfortunately, when I skype I shout as if I have to be heard on the other side of the world without the aid of technology. So all the Dedes overheard the conversation and they took issue with what was said.

I told my brother that the curator suggested it would be better if I sold the puppets. All of a sudden I heard this kerfuffle in the living room and through the glass door I could see all the Dedes huddled together for a group hug and then they scurried off towards the studio. I continued my conversation telling my brother that I am not ready yet to part with them and certainly not with the original cast. However, I might, and only might, think about creating some new characters to sell at the exhibition. But of course by that time my Dedes were already up in arms and painting placards.

They slipped this picture I posted here under my bedroom door and I haven’t seen any of them this morning.

Wednesday night is sports night, so I left the Dedes to their own devices. When I came home, they were lying on the sofa with stuffed tummies. Obviously they had been out collecting lollies, despite my explicit veto. I have to say, I didn’t feel sorry for them. Sunny’s permanent grin was gone, he looked like he was close to throwing up.  He didn’t in the end, but I hope it taught him a lesson. I am soooo happy that Halloween is only once a year.

Back to normal… We still have a vote going on, to decide who will get the job of heading the investigation into the cancellation email. It is a very close race… Bobby (the newcomer) is at the moment one vote ahead of Ducky (the dye in the wool politician) and Clay Head (the external consultant). ––  I love statistics :)

Unfortunately, like any other election, participation is pretty poor and to be honest we have only had one vote so far. My official statement of course is: “We are not releasing the figures”. If we don’t get any more votes by Friday (New Zealand time) when voting closes, it will be Bobby, who will head the investigation.