Archives for posts with tag: life

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Even though you could not tell from her reaction, Cash Cow was deeply offended by L’Artiste. She went straight to see Devil’s Advocate to complain about the artist and figure out if she could sue him.

“I fear for my life,” she said, “how can I stop him? Or at least get some money off him?”

Devil’s Advocate, being who he is, did not entirely agree with her and defended L’Artiste in absentia. “He is an artist and of course he meant what he said symbolically! He just wanted to shock to get noticed. Suing him is futile, he doesn’t have a penny.”

Cash Cow had the feeling her concerns were not taken seriously.

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“Ah well” she said throwing her arms in the air, “I have rights too. I will go and see if Top Dog can help!”

Devil’s Advocate was aghast. “Now we drove her into the arms of this evil puppet!” He was at a total loss how the relationship between two loveable Dedes could deteriorate so quickly. He understands both, but what can he do?

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We know now, Magician feels he is incapable of doing a magic trick for the Dedes. But wait, there are a few puppets that should be able to help. Esta Blished, the fairy godmother for example, should have magical powers too. Unfortunately it is a well-known fact that she has Alzheimers so she is away with the fairies most of the time. Every so often though she is totally lucid and such a moment just happened. She went to L’Artiste and said, “you know I have misplaced my book of spells, but artists can create magic too, can’t they?”

True, L’Artiste creates magic, but mainly for himself, when he is in the zone of making things. However, it is not the kind of magic, the Dedes are looking for. Remember, they need magic to make Top Dog disappear.

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So, L’Artiste went to see Cash Cow. (These two are indeed very difficult to picture together).

“I try so hard” said L’Artiste frustratedly, “but my magic can’t solve the problems of the world.” Then he hugged the old cow to lessen the impact of what he was about to say next. “Personally, I think the only hope for the world is to slaughter you.”

Cash Cow, who always looks like she is hard done by, wasn’t the least surprised. Obviously it wasn’t the first time that she heard this suggestion and she replied firmly “why do artists always have to be so melodramatic! Just concentrate on your work and leave me alone. If you are good you might make an impact one day!”

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Monkey, who is very worried because he belongs to a minority everyone laughs about, went to see Court Jester. He was upset and asked “Why didn’t you say outright they shouldn’t vote for that idiot?” 

“It is against the Jesters’ code of honour. Jesters don’t tell anyone what to do, instead they try to open your eyes.”

“But you know exactly where we are heading if this idiot comes to power.”

“There is only one thing I know exactly” said Court Jester now, “if you call someone an idiot, he is no longer prepared to listen. Believe you me, my profession has hundreds of years of experience. Being confrontational doesn’t get us anywhere. We have to remove the heat and approach the situation with a cooler head.”

Then he gave Monkey a big hug and said: “Trust me.”

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Court Jester went to discuss the result of yesterday’s questionnaire with the benevolent King. Turns out only three Dedes considered themselves weird. Strangely enough Top Dog wasn’t one of them. But fifty Dedes thought the others were weird. That was exactly the point Court Jester wanted to make: the weird ones are always the others! And herein lies the problem according to the jester.
Unfortunately, this morning the Dedes were also told that the majority of readers reckoned they were indeed weird. Though in the sense of wonderfully different and excitingly strange. They valued their weirdness as a positive attribute.  You should have seen the upheaval that revelation caused. Now they all wanted to do the questionnaire again. And this time, all of them ticked yes for the first question. Weird, indeed!

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Court Jester couldn’t watch it any longer. He finally came out and asked: “Are all you Dedes insane?”  He is used to holding long speeches in front of the King and he continued to explain what he meant: “Yeah, anger is a form of helplessness, but calling for the strong man? Look what happened in the real world ninety years ago, Mussolini, Stalin, Hitler, Franco! The last witnesses are still alive and you want to repeat this history? Why should it work this time? Because we have better weapons? I am not saying ‘don’t vote for Top Dog.’ All I am asking you to do is – Think about the consequences! And he certainly doesn’t get my vote!”

One of our instagram readers moss.creek  was quick to respond: “I read once that in a number of Shakspearen plays with similar stories; the difference between whether it turned into a tragedy or comedy was if the characters listened to their jester’s advice. I hope we come out laughing in our own play!”

Well, the Dedes also would love to continue laughing.

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Court Jester prepared a little questionnaire for all Dedes and asked them to fill it out by tomorrow. In the meantime he also asks our readers, “do you think any of the Dedes are weird?”

 

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“Admit it,” said Sunny to Mouse (who is a workaholic) “you have all laughed at me because I want to be an artist.” He just assumed that Mouse and the others all thought artists are slackers.

“We have not laughed at you, Sunny, we laughed about your approach,” Mouse explained and pointed to the billboard she just had installed. Then she reminded Sunny, that he spent years trying to find a patron without having any work to show. Worse, while he was trying, he ate all the other Dede’s pizzas. Everyone can recall the last sure thing he followed up. The time, when he tried to get the money from his deceased great-uncle in Nigeria. He is still waiting. The reminder, though true, made  Sunny very uncomfortable and he quickly headed for the exit.

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Then Rob D Light passed by the billboard, looked at it and shook his head. “Lucky them who still can afford dreams,” he thought, “I simply need a job for survival.”

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“Hang on,” said Nitpicker to Sunny “did you really mean what you said yesterday?”

“What would that be?” asked Sunny who could barely remember what he had for breakfast yesterday, let alone what he said.

“You said, that you knows the others think you are a loser because you want to be an artist” 

“Yes, that is the case,” Sunny nodded and smiled.

“How can you know what others think?” queried Nitpicker.

“They make me feel it,” answered Sunny.

“I can’t argue with what you feel, these are your personal emotions. But please don’t make others responsible for those emotions. Think about it, art is the basis of the Dedes and if they dislike artists wouldn’t they pull the rug from under their feet?”

Sunny shrugged his shoulders and mumbled, “that is too much to think about.”

Nitpicker shook his head in disbelief. “Rule No 1 in the artist’s handbook: Think!”

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“What does he mean by that?” Sunny asked L’Artiste finally, while they were cleaning the brushes. But of course his teacher didn’t have a clue what he was talking about.

“That I should not make others responsible for my emotions!” clarified Sunny.

“You tell me” replied the teacher.

“I wish you would give me more guidance” said Sunny quite annoyed. He really likes the quick answers.

“But I am guiding you to figure it out for yourself!”

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Norman T Newbie III had to go and see Sunny, the artist’s assistant, to get his protective coating. He quite liked the young aspiring artist and thought they had much in common. At least they both wear a baseball cap. He wasn’t afraid to ask “Hey, do you want to work with me? I am head of security for Top Dog.”

Sunny didn’t even have to think. “No thanks” he said, “I am definitely not working for that guy!”

“You can say what you want about Top Dog, but he certainly keeps his promises!” Norman T Newbie III said contentedly.

“What makes you think that?” Sunny asked surprised.

“He said I will get my final coat, and here I am already.”

Sunny sighed. “Sorry to burst your bubble, but the coating is common procedure for Dedes!”

After Norman T Newbie III had left Sunny went to see his teacher L’Artiste.

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“Is he really Head of Security?” asked Sunny quite depressed now. He knows he is considered one of the losers because he wants to be an artist.

“No way” said L’Artiste to console him. “He has just fluffed up his CV to make himself more important. He is no more than a common thug who does Top Dog’s dirty work!”

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Not surprisingly, Top Dog’s confidence was renewed by the support of the two puppets. Yesterday he came out shouting “Vote for me, vote for me. I have the balls” and to proof it he rolled two juggling balls into the room. Mouse was not impressed and asked whether we shouldn’t be worried about what is going on. At least she is. She is very scared indeed!  Though the majority of Dedes still don’t seem to take Top Dog seriously. I wonder if they all think he is simply a nutcase. The fronts are getting more defined though and both camps want more supporters.

It happened that it was very stormy yesterday, so the Dedes sent me into the studio to make a new puppet. I recorded a film to show how I do it. Okay, I cheated a little and I had the shape of the head prepared earlier, but you see how I put the skin on. Of course, I am not working that fast. To be honest, I am extremely slow.

(PS: Please don’t ask me what the cocoa powder is doing in the middle of the work bench. That is just dada.)

Even before the newbie had his final protective coat on he ran into trouble. He went to Devil and said “I need a gun.”

“What for?” asked Devil.

“To protect myself from all these weird Dedes!” was the answer

“But you are a Dede yourself!”

“But I am not weird!” he said adamantly.

Devil shook his head, put his hand on the new puppet’s shoulder and whispered in his ear, “oh boy, what you need is an open mind and a brain.”

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On a different note, can anyone suggest a name for the new puppet?

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Should we be concerned? This morning Bossman showed up and screamed “Don’t give me this ‘Embrace Diversity’ crap” There was no need to shout, as everyone else was quiet anyway. But he continued to bluster “Our times call for a strong leader. I vote for Top Dog.”

Nobody took much notice, who believes a screamer anyway? The Dedes just quietly continued doing what they were doing so far, business as usual. But then the thin voice of Mr Vague became audible. “I don’t have anything to say” he uttered “I need someone you speaks loudly for me. Top Dog does that!”

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I knew I was in trouble, when I opened my eyes and Devil and Mouse were sitting on my legs, so I couldn’t run away. Devil, glowing with anger, said “now, admit it this campaign is a flop! We wanted to increase our readership, and yes, we thought giving away a Dede was a good idea. Instead we lost quite a few followers!” And Mouse added “it is your fault because you want to turn a reader into a puppet! Who wants to be a puppet?” I didn’t see it quite that bad. Yes, we lost a few followers, but we also had some people who referered us to their friends and some very positive comments. Don’t forget I had just woken up, so I asked “What shall I do, shall I give up then?”

“Don’t be such a sensitive artist! But what on earth were you thinking!” Devil rolled his eyes. “I simply thought this would be a fun artistic collaboration project with one of our fans!” I replied. “Still,” said Devil, “make sure the followers know they will get a Dede, but if they don’t want it modelled on them, it won’t be.” “No problem” I said and this seemed to calm them down.

But they weren’t the only disgruntled Dedes this morning. The puppets that were lined up for the “Embrace Diversity” Project yesterday were unhappy too. They had gone to the studio and then their photo wasn’t used.

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At least the green one, Nosy Neighbour, was very vocal about it. He so would love to know what’s up with Ms Sm. He watches her from behind the curtain, but has no idea what is going on. So he happily agreed to pose with her. Ms Sm was much more reluctant to be on show. Though she totally agrees with the “Embrace Diversity” idea, she does not want to put herself on the line. She has had too many bad experiences. Gee was she relieved when she was saved by the milestone in the last minute. She happily keeps her secret to herself.

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And then last but not least, Top Dog took advantage of the current befuddled mood amongst the Dedes and continued to present himself as a victim to gain power. He finally dug out this old picture that proves the artist tried to muzzle him. Be careful, he keeps a file on everyone. In these files he documents all the mistreatments he had to endure. Perceived mistreatments, I should say, but here he disagrees again!