Pig and Professor don’t have a plan, they only have a solution. Thinking about it, it is not even a solution. They made themselves comfortable in the liquor cabinet and asked me to fetch them when something finally happens in the Dede world.
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Witch came up to me this morning with a plate of brown gunk. She is the one that is into healthy nutrition and the other puppets secretly make fun of her, as what she makes often doesn’t look or smell so good, or sound very palatable. Just to give you an example: for a while I had a pretty bad cough I couldn’t shift. She listened to it for weeks and weeks and finally she got fed up and made me eat a clove of raw garlic (garlic seems to be her panacea). It didn’t appeal to me at all, but she can be so persistent and I eventually swallowed it all. And would you believe it? The cough went away. But I digress.
So, this morning she presented me this plate of gooey stuff. “What’s that?” I asked suspciously, even though on closer scrutiny it looked like a sumptuous chocolate mousse. But I know Witch never cooks something as yummy as that.
“You say you don’t have any energy left. I really want to get you back to your old self. Otherwise we Dedes are doomed. So I made you this. This will fix you.”
“But what is it?’ I sniffed at it and it didn’t smell like garlic. I was relieved. I even thought I smelt a hint of brandy. But Witch is a teetotaller and she wouldn’t put any alcohol in it.
“Don’t be so suspicious, just try it…. It is a healthy chocolate pudding!”
“Now that is a contradiction in itself!” I said, though it made me curious. I took a deep breath and tried it. It tasted divine!
Witch watched me with great satisfaction. “Healthy food doesn’t have to be unpalatable. Do you believe me now?”
“To be honest this chocolate pudding doesn’t taste healthy at all” I said. “Something this delicious surely can’t be good for you. So tell me, what is it made of?”
“It’s made of teff flour”
“Teff?” I’ve never heard of it.
“It is an ethopian grain. Ever wondered why there are so many good ethopian long-distance runners? They eat bread made from teff. It is gluten free and has a very good balance of amino acids. A high content of calcium, zinc, iron, magnesium…” Witch started to lecture while my eyes glazed over.
“Just give me the recipe” I begged. “I want to have more of this.”
“You know that I don’t have recipes. I just experiment with food, but the recipe went something like this.” Witch took a pen and paper and wrote down:
Put 1/2 cup of teff flour in a pot and add two cups of water. Bring to a boil, then simmer for 15 mins. Stir continuously. (It will have the consisency of custard). Let it cool. Combine half a cup of cocoa powder with sugar (3 tablespoons will do, but if you have a very sweet tooth you might want to have more. If you don’t like sugar use stevia instead) and mix into the teff custard. Put in the fridge for an hour or so.
“The cooling down is very important” Witch pointed out while she wrote down the recipe. If the teff is still too hot when you put the cocoa in, the result will be firmer, more like a christmas pudding. When the mixture is cooler it is more like a mousse.
“But didn’t I taste a hint of brandy?”
“Ah well” Witch winked at me “that was my little treat for you. You can put all sorts of flavourings in.”
Well, I was wrong again. Last time I said the original Dedes and the Lil’Dedes didn’t want to know each other and they keep to their respective groups. Tomorrow the Lil’Dedes are leaving for Waiheke Island to be exhibited. When I started packing up you should have seen the monkeys. They didn’t want to let go of each other. Obviously they had forged a deep friendship in the few days they were together. They asked me for 10 minutes of privacy so they could say good bye to each other.
I feel really nasty now, that I break them up.
The Dedes are starting to run out of patience. They still haven’t moved into their new studio space. We are still busy sanding down window frames. I want to have the space perfect before I allow them to settle. Surprisingly, it was all good for a while. They seemed to be content as they could see the light at the end of the tunnel – or so I thought. I just assumed the Dedes know me well enough to sense how stressed I am and that it is not a good time to talk to me. I really appreciated that they gave me the space I needed and that they refrained from pushing me. But this morning it finally occured to me they don’t really understand that things take time. No! they have simply given up on me. All the projects that we’ve started came to a screeching halt. They have given up asking me about the tennis film and recording the Dada recitals and all the other fun things we had planned and were so excited about. Instead, they are terribly annoyed that I spend every spare minute making new Lil’Dedes for the upcoming exhibition. Needless to say, there is no love lost between the big ones and the little ones. The big ones keep to themselves and it is now very obvious that they are currently avoiding me!
This morning Devil and L’Artiste decided they couldn’t wait any longer and took action to speed things up. They went into the new space and had a good look at the sander. They discussed it, scratched their heads and figured out it will take at least two Dedes to shift the heavy thing. By the time they had dragged it to the window they were totally exhausted and needed a break. They still haven’t figured out how to switch the thing on. To be honest, I hope they never ever will…
Lil’ Devil has left for Berlin… and I will now reveal who he wanted to impress with his tiger print dress. (He would certainly blush if he knew I was telling you). He was a present for my lovely tutorial assistant, Theresa, and he really wanted to wow her.
Theresa is a gifted illustrator who won a scholarship to do her Masters in New Zealand. The programme she was enrolled in is a Masters by project. This means the students produce a new body of work and write an exergesis rather than an entirely theoretical thesis. In her project Theresa investigated living in a different culture and her final work was a graphic novel. Much to my suprise, one of the chapters was dedicated to the Dedes. In this chapter she processed the conversations we had and let the puppets do the talking. I have to say, she did a wonderful job capturing the Dedes (and the conversations). I only have a copy of the Dede chapter but you should have seen her other drawings: beautiful and elaborate cityscapes, with heaps to see and read and chuckle about. She is certainly one to watch out for. I have no doubt she will be very, very successful.
I hope Lil’ Devil is a good luck charm and he will watch out for her in difficult times. He promised me – in true Dede fashion – that he is ready to have a conversation whenever she feels like it :). Maybe she will even get him a new dress.
I was so curious to watch the Dedes exploring their new space. I wanted to see their enjoyment, which of course would give me the confirmation that it was all worth it. Unfortunately there is always someone who spoils the party! I overheard Chamber Maid saying to Mouse: “Nice space, but who is going to keep it clean. It looks good now, but in a weeks time it will look like a dump!”
Oh the agony of choice! Who am I going to take? It is certainly not easy to find a perfect travel companion.
I am going to attend a puppeteering workshop in Melbourne, so I will be busy during the day and the Dede I take will have to look after himself while I am out playing with other puppets. I assume this fact isn’t easy to swallow for some of them.
Arindam and Tony made very good suggestions. Mouse of course is the best organiser. If I took her I wouldn’t need to worry about anything. She would take care of any problems. Her downside of course is that she tries to pack too much into a single day. No doubt she would hustle me from each must see sight to the next without a break. She knows my current financial situation too and wouldn’t even allow me a coffee. She can be very harsh. My batteries are pretty flat at moment and to be honest, I couldn’t face a weekend with her! Another time, yes… but not this time.
Other suggestions were Scardy Pants and Lap Dog and I thought Chamber Maid would be a good contender too. On closer scrutiny though, I realised none of them could cope with being on their own during the day, but for different reasons: Scardy Pants doesn’t have any self-esteem. You have to coerce him out of the house at the best of times. He is so easily scared that even his own shadow gives him a fright. Lap Dog on the other hand is clingy. She doesn’t want to be on her own because she gets bored. She follows you around like a shadow. And the third puppet, Chamber Maid, is proud to be the shadow. Her strength is to be neither seen nor heard. If I took her she would rather stay in the hotel room and mend my socks than go out and explore. She can mend my socks at home and I know she would happily step aside to let another puppet go.
For now I have short listed Granddad Max, Cool Cat and Milky Bar Devil. What I need is a Dede that can explore during the day, but will listen to me at dinner time. I know myself. I will be full of new ideas after a day at the workshop. And when I have new ideas I can’t stop talking. Granddad Max is hard of hearing, so he would be perfect. However, he easily gets lost and letting him loose in a place where he has never been before…. I don’t know. Help! It is all too hard!
Evan G List is one of the new puppets and it didn’t take him long to get upset with me. He is a very mild looking character with smiley eyes and glasses. Honestly, he looks like he couldn’t hurt a fly and is very forgiving to boot. How could I upset him so easily?
It happened in the gallery. One day I had a conversation with a lady and I asked her which puppet she liked the most. The lady pointed straight to Evan and told me she really loves his eyes. “He looks so benevolent” she said, “but what is the significance of his name?” I read it out aloud: Evangelist, and I explained that his initial name was TV Evangelist, but on second thought I considered it too blunt. She looked at him again and admitted quietly: “I don’t know if I still like him. I really fell for his eyes!” All I could say was “that is how it works!” And we both burst out laughing.
Of course Evan was not amused. He had tried so hard to catch a soul and find someone to take him home. While he still smiled he muttered something about lost souls and redemption and he hopes we get caught by the devil. He hasn’t spoken to me since.
Picture supplied by Punch’s new owner
I know I wanted to tell you a snippet from the exhibition today, but then I received this lovely email telling me about what Punch too is up to. I do understand now why he was so keen on leaving and finding a new home. When I read the message I remembered instantly that he had recited Shakespeare before, but the other Dedes weren’t a particularly good audience. He was very serious and gave it his best, but some of the others made fun of him. This really put him off and he never tried again, or at least not publicly. He might have honed his skills in front of the bathroom mirror though. I am so pleased that he found someone who appreciates his gift. Do I spot a victorian lace collar in this image?
Here is the complete email:
Hello Dietlind and Dedes one and all.
Well, Punch has been sharing with me over the past few days since his arrival and has helped with the household budgeting to boot!
Often when I am tempted to buy something in a shop I hear him encouraging me to exercise a modicum of self restraint. Now who’d have thought a Dede could have such magical powers. haha. Anyway, it’s worked so far although I think he may have ulterior motives.
During one of our frequent tete-a-tetes he divulged his unrequited love for Freeloader saying they had a shared history of mistaken identity! It’s a long story so more of this later.
As evening fell and I was preparing the traditional Friday night curry I could hear him in the sunroom muttering to himself and on paying a bit more attention I could not believe my ears. “oh Horatio ( quoth he )…An unlifted shadow lies across my memory ….Things standing thus unknown shall live behind me….If thou didst ever hold me in your heart…absent thee from felicity awhile….and in this harsh world draw thy breath in pain…..To tell my story.” I could only applaud and throw roses where he stood. I think he has the makings of a fine Shakespearian actor.
Yesterday I had some wonderful news which involves Harvey and Mr XL. Remember Mr XL? He is my lovely neighbour in the office building who got sucked in by Harvey the gambling rabbit. Harvey had played the poor little rabbit card to get Mr XL to canvas votes for him to get into the finals for the Super Dede Competition 2012. Mr XL did a fantastic job and secured a place for Harvey in the competition. The entire story is too long to recap now, but here is the link. Needless to say, Mr XL and Harvey forged a strong bond as a result.
On Sunday, just as we were about to start the puppet workshop Mr XL walked into the Gallery and Harvey, who has a place somewhere in the back spotted him immediately and waved him over. I couldn’t really pay much attention to what they were up to and by the time the workshop had finished Mr XL was gone. Harvey, being a gambler, didn’t say a thing.
Anyway, the next morning I stopped by Mr XL’s office for a neighbourly chat. I was curious about the latest gossip from the Dedes. You know, the kind of things they would only tell a stranger but not me, because it is too close to home.
“Harvey and I” Mr XL said “came up with a cunning plan and he left it up to me to talk to you about it.”
I rolled my eyes and thought, what’s that gambler up to now?
Mr XL explained that he would have liked to buy Harvey for his granddaughter, but Harvey was seriously taken aback. He is worried that he will be ill-treated and his ears ripped off. So he wasn’t too keen to go with Mr XL. “Don’t listen to him” I said, quite angry “there is no way someone could rip his ears off. He is rock solid. He is just trying to make you feel bad.”
“Ah,” Mr XL said. “Don’t worry, he couldn’t fool me. I sensed he really wants to stay with his chums. But of course there is no way he would admit how much he depends on his friends. Instead, he used the excuse that he is an artwork, not a toy, and that he will increase in value if treated well.”
“Of course he would say that. He is a gambler, always betting on the future.”
“Yes,” Mr XL said. “But it made me think. If I buy him, he will be written out of the story and therefore his value won’t increase as much as if he stays!”
“Right, but he will always be a Dede and we wont forget him.” Particularly after his stunt last year, I thought.
“Hear me out” Mr XL said. “What do you think about some sort of sponsorship? I buy him now, but I leave him with you and he can continue living with his friends and being in the story.”
I had to sit down. What a generous offer! “How can I say no!” I said “I will throw a mug with his picture from the zazzle store into the deal.” Good thing Harvey wasn’t around. Can you believe what Mr XL said then? “Deal… but on my mug I want to have Snippedy the clown, not Harvey.”
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