Wait, there is more! Last night Skeleton Edeltraut came into the kitchen. This is a very rare sight, as Edeltraut lives in the closet and doesn’t eat at all! Mouse wondered what brought her into the kitchen. It turns out Skeleton Edeltraut has a big problem. Bad Conscience has moved in with her. You may know that Bad Conscience latches on to other Dedes only to make them feel very, very uncomfortable. He will drag them down if they don’t manage to move him on quickly. Of course he never likes what the other Dedes do and currently he takes great pleasure in poking fun at the Artist’s Survival Cookbook. He informed Skeleton he was a celiac and couldn’t eat anything with gluten. This is why the book is total rubbish.
“The poor thing.” Mouse said empathetically. “I can understand why he thinks the book is no good. True, it is not for him. But it is very helpful for the 99 percent of the population that hasn’t got a problem with gluten.”
“What do you mean?” asked Skeleton. “I thought far more than just 1 in 100 people are affected.”
“Some have non-celiac gluten sensitivity” said Mouse, “and some just avoid gluten because it is fashionable at the moment.”
“But what shall I do? I have to feed Bad Conscience. I have some guests coming on the weekend and I don’t want him to be a party pooper. You know how he can be.”
“You’re right,” said Mouse. “No matter what the reason for his gluten-abstinence, he has to eat.” She didn’t have to think long and suggested that Skeleton Edeltraut try corn chips. They are easy to make, truly delicious and go well with any dip. Mouse explained they are made from finely ground corn meal (the one you can use to make polenta) and water, then baked in the oven with no fat. She poured some of the corn meal on a plate for Edeltraut to show to Bad Conscience. He wasn’t too interested in what it was as long as it is gluten free.
“As there is no gluten in corn meal the dough doesn’t stick together well. It is more like making a dough from fine sand.” Mouse explained. “To make life easier, use baking paper. The dough falls apart when moved.”
1 cup of corn meal, 1/2 cup of water, 1 teaspoon of salt (chilli pepper and other spices to flavour)
Preheat the oven to 2000C
Pour corn meal in a bowl and add the spices you want to use. Mix well. Then add the water and knead for a few minutes. The dough should be wet and not too crumbly (it’s similar to the mixture you use to build sand castles at the beach). When formed into a ball, it should hold its shape. If it crumbles add more water.
Use two sheets of baking paper the size of the baking tray. Put the dough on one, cover with the other piece of paper and roll out with a rolling pin until it’s 1 millimeter thick. Remove the top baking paper. Cut the dough into triangles and place in the oven for 8 minutes. The thinner the dough, the easier they brown, so watch!
Remove the tray from the oven, flip the baking paper over (so that all the shapes are turned over) and remove the paper. At this stage the chips are quite soft, a little like leather, as they have only dried on one side. Put them back in the oven for another 8 minutes or until crisp. They are better overdone, than under.