I had lunch today with a very dear friend of mine, who incidentally also reads my blog. She commented on me slipping into the deep and meaningful at the moment. Ah well, I am still on the search where the puppets came from. But I guess I have to ease up a little. My post yesterday didn’t go down too well :). This morning I was thinking of writing about what I call “emotional cross-dressers”, but I give it a miss. I have to think about the subject for a little longer anyway.
A few years back I attended a training course for a volunteer organisation. One could describe the course as psychology for lay people. Most of it was common sense. But there was this one diagram describing the basic mental attitudes, which I found very good. I re-drew it this morning; something I wanted to do for some time. Yep, I know representatives of each and every one of those four catagories.
Personally, I am oscillating between the two left images (as I guess most women do!) When I am in the top left, everything is honky dory. I strongly believe in win-win situations and I work hard to achieve them. When I am in the bottom left, my soul mate comes in very handy :). Thank you!
Problems arise, when I come across someone who has the mental attitude of the top right quadrant. Often I simply walk away, but I can also turn into a lioness, particularly if a third party is involved. Lioness mode, believe me, is not a pretty picture and it is very exhausting, so I try to avoid it… Unfortunately I am not always successful.
Further to my post of yesterday… I had a few conversations since and I realised I wasn’t entirely clear in what I’ve said.
It is very sad, but ultimately I think (and this is my very own cheerless opinion) we are alone in the world. I believe there is no way, one human being can ever completely know and comprehend another living being (often we don’t know ourselves). At the same time we crave for others to understand our individuality, we are searching for closeness, for acceptance. We want to be understood, we want to be looked after, we want others to help us carry our burden and share our plight. We want for someone to complement what we are lacking. We want, we want, we want… But of course on our terms… People are selfish! But if we wouldn’t look after ourselves who would?
I can understand that humans look to Him and find solace. We are here on borrowed time and only once, so we have to make the best of it! There might be re-incarnation. I don’t know. I will find out one day. In the meantime I try to be nice to people. I say I try, as it doesn’t always work this way… I have no influence on how people perceive me. They might not like my frown lines, they might not like the pitch of my voice or my accent… all things I can’t change, and I shrug my shoulders and say: their problem not mine… On the other hand, if somebody is grumpy… How do I know what happened to them before we bumped into each other? Maybe their wife just left them, or their father had a car accident, or their child was diagnosed with an untreatable disease. Their grumpiness might not have anything to do with me at all…
It is this split second of eternity in which we meet and make a decision about whether we like or dislike a person. Scaaaaryyyy! And, be honest, once we have formed an opinion about someone it is very, very difficult to change.
To cut a long story short, what I am advocating is, find yourself a person who has similar values as you have, fall in love with this person and note, IN love is a completely different feeling than love itself. Being in love is a wonderful folly, and a period of exaggeration and best behaviour. Love itself is a feeling that has to be nourished to grow, a feeling of warmth despite all the flaws, the farts and burps. If it is allowed to grow it will lead to the ultimate trust… in the acceptance of two people in their individuality and differences. And this is what I mean by soul mate.
First a warning: Most people actually don’t want to be happy – as truly happy people are so, so boring. What makes life interesting are the spikes, not equilibrium.
I have learned to embrace my ups and downs. I have learned that the proverbial brick wall stops me only temporarily. I don’t have to force my way through it, there is always a way around it. Finding this detour often requires a pause, to sit down and ponder.
On my personal list of happiness there are only two items, and they are by no means fame and riches. On my list is one item you should have and one you shouldn’t. Not too difficult, is it?
The item you absolutely need to have is a soul mate!
What you need to get rid of are any personal expectations you have of him/her, so that you will keep this gem for a long long time to come!
As easy as…
Funnily enough, most of my friends seem to think the first part is the difficult one. In fact it is the second, the working on the relationship, trying not to re-model the person you’ve found to fit your ideas. Without expectation the ideas will grow together in due time :)
Then when you hit the brick wall your fall will be cushioned!
The connection to yesterday’s image are the wings, otherwise they have nothing in common. I could easily write a twenty page essay about the meaning of this photograph, which is called Fly shit on the world, but don’t worry, I won’t. It is obvious that there are many different layers to it.
It is another example of the images I thought would only appeal to me as the artist. I was surprised the other day when I had it up on my screen at work and a friend walked in and said to me: “Print this on A1 and I’ll hang it up.” Before I could be flattered he added “What is it?” I guess he must have been attracted to the colours in the first instance. I couldn’t enter into a discussion with him, he was gone as quickly as he had come and along the way lost his chance to get a print-out of this one. I am happy to give him another one of my images though, one that is more easily understood.
More of the gannets today.
It was an advantage that there weren’t as many birds as there are in summer. It made it easier to observe how the birds interact with each other. They are very noisy creatures. There is constant screeching and squawking. After all, they have to out-scream the thundering water and howling wind. And if the wind comes in from the sea, the smell can become unbearable. It was an offshore wind last Sunday.
The situation in the picture here reminded me so of a schoolyard scuffle. Two birds started to have a go at each other. One was egging them on, a third one was watching from a distance. The last one pretended to only be remotely interested. His only concern seemed to be whether he had to move or could stay. They were going at it for quite a while.
Since today is more about documenting the gannets rather than an artistic interpretation, I have added another close-up image. Doesn’t he look like a winner?
I would love to have a new lens, to get even closer next time.
I digressed again, didn’t I?
The blog is supposed to be about the dede puppets and it is time to introduce the latest addition to the troupe: Push-Push. She is a nice enough puppet, but she is always blowing her own trumpet. If you look past the glitter, you will find she is plain boring, and doesn’t have many ideas of her own. She loves to slip into her colourful circus gear and a real transformation takes place: “Look at me, look at me, look at what I can do” she calls out. And then she shows you tricks as old as Methuselah. “Yawn,” I say and walk away.
This is another one of my favorite images, even though not many people I showed it to share my excitement. Actually nobody I showed it to liked it, but then I think only a handful of people have seen it so far.
I admire the old lady, holding tightly on to her handbag, striding out with great determination. Her crooked body still exudes purpose. There is no waiver in her gait. Straight down the middle, protected by spring-green chestnut trees. These trees have been around for centuries and have seen many old ladies passing by. (Yes, I do understand why other people might not get excited :)
Yesterday I had some time to do more research on the Internet regarding the puppet world. I found some amazing stuff overseas, but New Zealand looks pretty grim. There is a “Puppeteers in New Zealand” organisation. But their website (Pinz.org.nz) has a very neglected feel. There is a forum with 13 members but it is locked and the last entry was 2010.
There are of course puppeteers for children around and there seems to have been a New Zealand Puppet Theatre founded by Annie Forbes in 1984, which was going for some years. Annie Forbes, a third generation puppeteer, has moved to Australia.
The funniest thing I found was on Wikipedia (puppetry subhead oceania). There are a couple of good paragraphs about Australia and then – New Zealanders hold onto your seats!– one sentence: “In New Zealand, a similar history has taken place.” That’s it! Thinking about it now, that might be because all the good puppeteers have moved across the Tasman (see above).
I am going to finish Push-Push today.
These two, Pig and Witch, were early puppets. (If I recall correctly, Witch was the third puppet I ever made). They are a reminder of how relationships change over time. These two were really good mates once, but now they can’t stand each other. I don’t know exactly what happened, but I suspect it is because Witch turned into a health freak and a teetotaler, while Pig likes his booze. Pig is now hanging out with Professor while Witch keeps more or less to herself.
I noticed the more puppets I make the more negative (in my opinion) traits they display. The first lot of fifteen, they were my friends. They have their little quirks, the ones you just reckon with in friends. Some of them I like more, others a little less, but they are all puppets I wouldn’t mind inviting round to my place.
The newer ones are more like acquaintances. I know them, but some of them have traits I totally dislike. The worst is, that I can easily come up with these now.
I have two more books planned for later this year, early next year. The next one will be of course about Puppy the love sick stalker (by the way, he has moved back into the house and he is starting to annoy me) and the following one will be about Hermit loosing his job. Pretty sure all the negative characters will find their place in this one.
I am currently working on a puppet called Push–Push. It is one that drives her own agenda, no matter what. Along the way she tramples all over the others. Yes, pretty sure you find her at the average workplace. And then I think, I really need to get started on Procrastinator as well.
Friends! Yes, tell me what constitutes a friend? Now this is a curly and very personal question. I don’t believe it can be answered comprehensively, not even by the most studied people. Last night, the question was brought up in conversation, and this here is another one of my unscientific and personal observations.
In German we have this word “Freund” which looks and sounds very much like the English word “friend”. These two words even have similar meanings and they could be mistaken as being the same. They are not.
In Germany you would only call a very clear and manageable amount of people “Freund.” Everybody else you’ve personally met is an acquaintance or a “friend of a friend”. I think when I left Germany I was down to two friends :).
Of course the Germans still use the two-tier of “you”. They have two terms: The close “Du” and the distant “Sie.” When you address somebody with “Du”, you are usually on a first name basis as well: you are friends. While “Sie” is usually used in combination with the surname. Oh it is all very complicated. To cut a long story short, the term used indicates the closeness of the people involved. The whole thing is a bit looser nowadays than it was when I lived there, but it is still there.
In New Zealand, (I don’t know how it is in other countries, as I have only lived in New Zealand long enough to have formed an opinion), virtually everybody you’ve met twice is your friend. Now this sounds very superficial, doesn’t it? It isn’t really.
For starters there is only one term to address the person opposite: “you.” This little fact tears down a lot of barriers.
Since I moved here the number of people I call friend has grown exponentially. But they all have one thing in common: I know them face-to-face. This fact keeps the number naturally manageable. My friends can drop in on me any time and have a conversation. What constitutes a conversation? (Don’t let me go there, not now… )
The word acquaintance is very rarely used here. I am not quite sure, but it seems if you use the word acquaintance, you have met the person, but don’t really have anything to do with them. I wrecked my brain, but I personally couldn’t come up with anybody I would refer to as an acquaintance here, though in German I would happily use the word for a number of people. I might refer to somebody as a “colleague from xyz” or “an artist guy I know”, or the “plumber who did my bathroom”. But acquaintance, no, I don’t have them in New Zealand.
Now bring on face book… I guess you can figure out my opinion. I’ll go and make a puppet in the meantime.
PS: You have certainly gathered my conversation was with a German :)
dedepuppets 